“Me lay with you momma.” That’s what this sweet babe said to me as she crawled up in my lap. I had just finished looking at her first mom’s profile on Facebook when she said those words to me. The enormity of that moment was not lost on me. I check on her mom every so often. I like seeing the similarities between Baby K and her first mom. I like knowing she’s okay.
Some may think it’s odd that I can have positive emotions towards her first mom, especially after what we went through with her sister. I look at my little brown-eyed, dimple-faced, strong-willed little 3 year old; and I can’t feel anything but.
Love is not something you give with “conditions.” It’s a gift freely given. If you “love” someone based on merit or what they can do for you, it’s not love. I think we lose sight of that a lot. We are all about what best serves us: how can I get this task accomplished best on my time table, what can I do to make myself look better, do these friends nurture me how I need to be nurtured, how will this make my reputation look to others?
It makes me think of this story, of a girl who used boys (and occasionally friends) to help accomplish or fulfill whatever need or task she had at that time. A girl whose parents didn’t have a lot of money, but she still insisted on having name brand clothes. A girl who used to talk bad about others who didn’t fit her idea of “cool.” A girl who thought she always had all the right answers. A girl who made a lot of mistakes in order to “fit in.” A girl who was often looking for attention in the wrong ways. Then there was this person who came along and said “I love you just as you are. I loved you, knowing every mistake you would make in life.” The girl, probably obviously, was me. The “person” is God.
*** Can I also tell you, there is no weakness in admitting your faults? We all have shortcomings and have made mistakes in life. Your mistakes do not define you!!!***
I have been loved regardless of my short comings, just because He chose to love me. It’s as simple and complicated as that. Thankfully, God has put people in my life who have loved me in the same capacity. The love I feel for Baby K and allll her family is as simple and complicated as that as well. I don’t pretend to understand every thing. (I don’t know many things). I don’t have to know or understand to love.
Many times, the “Christian” voices we hear in the world are quick to impart “law” or “rules” to people. I’m not saying those are not necessary in life, but “law” cannot change a person’s heart. Christian or not. The grace of God is what changes you. His love for you WHILE you were a sinner is what changes you.
So today, tomorrow, this week…if you meet someone. Try not to “size them up.” Try not to assess their every life choice or move. Try to just love. Sometimes you can have a huge impact on someone’s life by just choosing to support and love. Just ask Baby K, or me.
1 John 4:16b “God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.”